Public Speaking
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Wednesday, October 12th, 2011We all recognize bullies who yell, hit and make nasty remarks. But how do you stop bullies who use the letter of the rules to gain power by browbeating co-workers and getting them in trouble? For example, in the last two years, Jane had lodged written complaints about numerous employees who’d broken rules. The result: [...]
Vote Selfish, Narcissistic, Insensitive People off Your Isle of Song
Sunday, October 9th, 2011Sometimes things are very clear and straightforward even though carrying them out may be difficult. But that’s a lot better than not being clear. Rabindranath Tagore, Nobel Prize winning poet, said, “Create an isle of song in a sea of shouts.” This vision provides clarity about the direction we want our lives – situation after [...]
Stop Employees who Bully Workplace over ‘Morale’ Claims
Wednesday, October 5th, 2011Who’s responsible for an employee’s morale? Many people think it’s the manager’s responsibility. But I say it depends. For example, before Sarah became manager of her new team, she’d been warned that the group had longstanding problems with low productivity and morale. Sarah rapidly discovered the warnings were accurate. Her staff spent too much time [...]
Stop Bullying, Abuse: Say, “That’s Enough!”
Sunday, October 2nd, 2011We’ve talked about the first two important steps to stop bullying, abusive spouses: The first step toward freedom is to use experts’ checklists to recognize and label our spouses’ behavior as “bullying” and our demanding, controlling, narcissistic, abusive spouses as “bullies,” in order to generate our own power. We may use that power to re-enter [...]
Be wary of these business animals
Tuesday, September 27th, 2011Lion tamers and snake handlers can be great entertainment. But taming the wild beasts in your own work office is no fun. It’s something you have to do, however, if they’re preventing your team meetings from being productive. If they’re on your team, you must control, channel or remove these destructive beasts:
Stop Bullying, Abuse: Be Your Own Expert
Sunday, September 25th, 2011When we follow experts’ checklists, and we recognize and label our spouses’ behavior as “bullying” and our demanding, controlling, narcissistic, abusive spouses as “bullies,” we generate our own power. We may use that power to re-enter the fight with renewed vigor and a new sense that we’re right. But many bullies, especially demanding, controlling, narcissistic, [...]
Take Power: Recognize and Label Bullying Spouses
Sunday, September 18th, 2011People often wonder if they’re being bullied, controlled or abused by their spouses. They want experts to help them recognize the signs and give them an educated, experienced opinion so they’ll have a new weapon in the next round of the endless battle. That’s a useful tactic but the major benefits are not what most [...]
To Increase Confidence and Self-Esteem: Test the World, Not Yourself
Sunday, September 4th, 2011We grow up testing ourselves; “Are we good enough? If not it’s our fault. Did we succeed; we still could have done more. Did we fail; it’s our fault.” Testing ourselves is a motivation strategy, “Figure out what’s wrong with us and improve it.” And behind it is the hidden message, “We’re defective and we’d [...]
Stop Bullies Who Demand their Way
Sunday, August 21st, 2011I was at a wedding and a funeral last week. Really; not a movie. And the people were fine. But I was reminded of all the times I’ve been at big family events when some selfish, narcissistic, abusive, controlling, bullying family member demanded that they get their way or they’d make a scene, make everyone [...]
Teachers’ Unions Don’t Protect Kids from Bullies
Sunday, August 14th, 2011The Teachers’ union is clear: since dues are paid by teachers, not by kids or parents, the union’s job is to protect and increase teachers’ salaries and seniority. I love good teachers. I come from a family of teachers. My life has been crucially enriched by teachers. I teach. But I won’t support the teachers’ [...]
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