Coaching
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Wednesday, October 19th, 2011How’s this for a challenging assignment: You’re the new manager of a 14-person team that’s been together four years. During your first two days with the team, nine people come to you one-to-one and complain vehemently about two team members, Laura and Frances. They’re angry: Laura and Frances come in late, leave early, ignore assignments [...]
Stop Bullies Who Scold, Chastise
Sunday, October 16th, 2011Most people think that if they made a mistake, broke the rules, weren’t good at something or did something wrong they deserve what they get. So they accept being scolded, chastised and browbeaten. This attitude is so common that we have many words and expressions for these put-downs and abuse. For example, admonished, assailed, assaulted, [...]
Stop Workplace Bullies who Beat you up with the Rules
Wednesday, October 12th, 2011We all recognize bullies who yell, hit and make nasty remarks. But how do you stop bullies who use the letter of the rules to gain power by browbeating co-workers and getting them in trouble? For example, in the last two years, Jane had lodged written complaints about numerous employees who’d broken rules. The result: [...]
Vote Selfish, Narcissistic, Insensitive People off Your Isle of Song
Sunday, October 9th, 2011Sometimes things are very clear and straightforward even though carrying them out may be difficult. But that’s a lot better than not being clear. Rabindranath Tagore, Nobel Prize winning poet, said, “Create an isle of song in a sea of shouts.” This vision provides clarity about the direction we want our lives – situation after [...]
Stop Employees who Bully Workplace over ‘Morale’ Claims
Wednesday, October 5th, 2011Who’s responsible for an employee’s morale? Many people think it’s the manager’s responsibility. But I say it depends. For example, before Sarah became manager of her new team, she’d been warned that the group had longstanding problems with low productivity and morale. Sarah rapidly discovered the warnings were accurate. Her staff spent too much time [...]
Stop Bullying, Abuse: Say, “That’s Enough!”
Sunday, October 2nd, 2011We’ve talked about the first two important steps to stop bullying, abusive spouses: The first step toward freedom is to use experts’ checklists to recognize and label our spouses’ behavior as “bullying” and our demanding, controlling, narcissistic, abusive spouses as “bullies,” in order to generate our own power. We may use that power to re-enter [...]
Be wary of these business animals
Tuesday, September 27th, 2011Lion tamers and snake handlers can be great entertainment. But taming the wild beasts in your own work office is no fun. It’s something you have to do, however, if they’re preventing your team meetings from being productive. If they’re on your team, you must control, channel or remove these destructive beasts:
Stop Bullying, Abuse: Be Your Own Expert
Sunday, September 25th, 2011When we follow experts’ checklists, and we recognize and label our spouses’ behavior as “bullying” and our demanding, controlling, narcissistic, abusive spouses as “bullies,” we generate our own power. We may use that power to re-enter the fight with renewed vigor and a new sense that we’re right. But many bullies, especially demanding, controlling, narcissistic, [...]
Take Power: Recognize and Label Bullying Spouses
Sunday, September 18th, 2011People often wonder if they’re being bullied, controlled or abused by their spouses. They want experts to help them recognize the signs and give them an educated, experienced opinion so they’ll have a new weapon in the next round of the endless battle. That’s a useful tactic but the major benefits are not what most [...]
Stop Mean Girl School Bullies
Sunday, September 11th, 2011Mean girls, like mean guys, can make middle and high school a wounding, scarring misery for many kids. We’d expect elementary school friendships to change as girls develop different interests in boys, studies, athletics, music, art and science at different rates – especially interests in boys. We’d expect old friends to drift apart. But the [...]
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